We ache. We bruise. We bleed. We suffer. We turn from ourselves. We are afraid of it. Our power. The power of our rage. The reality of death. The ever-looming lessons that can only be taught to us through the bloody sport that is life.
We will not leave here intact.
We lose. We lose the only thing we ever really had. We lose our life. We lose at life. We waste time fighting the wrong battles. We fight in vain. We fall prey to fighting for a system that promises us it will protect us but really just feeds off us. We are blamed for being ourselves. We are scapegoated. We scapegoat. We are caught in situations that have no right answers available. We can scream at all the gods from here until the end of days and no answer is ever promised us. Life is not, in any way, fair.
Not by a long shot.
Life just is. It isn’t sensible or logical. Life is a great injustice. And life, as unfair and grueling as it is, isn’t even guaranteed us. The lives of those we love isn’t either. How are we to make meaning out of such a chaotic cacophony? What do we do in the face of these odds? How do we live with such heartbreak and ache?
That’s the question we each have to find our own answer to with as much authenticity as possible. It is our duty. It is our birthright. To find a way to dance in the face of death. It is life’s painful poetry. If we are to truly grab this life and live it, we must let it be written across our days. Across our hearts. Across our lives. Through all we do, in the face of everything we have lost, might lose and are sure to have taken from us, we are here to find the courage to live out our answer to this ancient riddle.
This month’s full moon (Thursday, April 21st at 10:24 PM PT) falls within the intense waters of Scorpio. Scorpios shines in such paradoxes. Scorpio does not shy away from the horrors of life. Scorpio knows that to live everyday as preparation for our great demise, is to truly live. Scorpio knows that death can arrive at our doorstep at any moment, but until it steals our last breath we have every right to suck the marrow out the bone of this beast.
Scorpio is the nocturnal domain of Mars. Ruled by the Warrior, this energy is best put to use for secret missions and symbolic death/rebirth transformations. Scorpio displays the stealth moves of an undercover agent. Slowly, steadily, secretly making their way to success, Scorpio is in it for the long haul, in it to win it. Scorpio is calculating, extremely cunning and psychologically astute. You cannot play a player and Scorpio is here to remind you why.
With its finger ever on the pulse of the psychological motives that move this world, Scorpio teaches us about what lives beneath. Beneath the facades. Beneath the shiny gloss. Beneath all we try to floss. Beneath the niceties and the need to please, lives within each of us a deep well of untamable, unsocialized, unruly emotional energy. This full moon and the next ten weeks of the Mars retrograde cycle are asking us to make this conscious so that we can work with it rather than be used by it.
Full moon blessings,
xc